By Christopher Lewis Durr’s father – George Durr
for Father’s Day 2026
Hello all you fathers out there. This is Christopher Lewis Durr’s father George Durr. February 9, 2026; exactly five years after I lost my only child, I woke up with a deep amount of sadness and wrote the following, “Forgive me for chiming in so early (6am EST). I realized that one of the reasons I have been so down on myself is because I lack the good feeling that a father gets. I want to feel like a father again and be asked fatherly advice. All of you who are fathers out there feel much better when your children ask for advice and they act on it. As a result, a good outcome occurs. That is what I lack in feelings. Again, if this doesn’t pertain to you no need for a response. Thanks for reading.”
Christopher Lewis Durr, who passed away in a fatal car accident, one month before turning 22; had an immense number of great things happen to him. To see and realize that his positive attitude, his astonishing intellectual capacity, will never come to fruition is extremely heartbreaking. As an example, Christopher skipped second grade, graduated with honors from High School at age 16, and with honors from UCI at age 19. This is a goal that most humans cannot achieve and only dream about.
The night before he passed away, Christopher and I had our daily conversation. If I knew that was going to be the last time I talked to him and gave him fatherly advice, I wish I recorded that hour and a half of great conversation. Unbeknownst to me as he was verbally telling me how great of a father, I am, how much he loved me, how much he wished that he had a girlfriend, he was also indirectly telling me ‘Goodbye’.
Many of us spend close to a quarter of century playing the role of fatherhood to the best of our ability. Only for the number one positive role in life that was given to you by a higher power, to your number one love and existence of living as a loving and caring father; being taken away at an instant, is beyond devastating.
I realize now that I need to write and live a new chapter. Every day I was with Christopher was a gift. I would hug him and sing to him. This all gave me joy and pleasure for living and being alive. Part of my new chapter is to give all the love that I had for Christopher to my loving wife Lorena. Lorena will continue to be the love of my life. I look forward to all three of us reuniting in Heaven. In the meantime, my loving angel Christopher Lewis Durr will watch over both of us. So yes, those of us fathers who have never experienced what I directly experience will never truly understand how much of a loss it is to lose your only child. I also know that those who have experienced what I experienced feel that no words written or said can bring back my loss. My only hope is that this touches you enough for you to begin to understand how I am feeling and to begin to heal as you write your own next chapter.
Alive Alone is looking for essays or short articles to publish as blog posts. Please email Roger at webmaster@alivealone.org.
Photo by Steve DiMatteo on Unsplash
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